The last days

Tuesday was my last day in Uganda and Wednesday was the last day of journeying. I was able to visit Egypt on my way back.

I spent the Tuesday at the project. First thing in the morning I did something I'd been meaning to do the whole time and visited the landing site where the fishermen bring in and sell their catches in the morning. It was only 20 mins walk and I went to the site with Counsellor Dixon and Barbara and her sister.

Where the lake met the land was like a swamp. It was mostly women on the muddy shore cleaning and organising the catches; when a fisherman rowed back from his work, the people waded out to meet him and negotiate a price for the fish. There was a chap in charge who presided over most dealings. I was shown around by Dixon who got a mamba and mud fish for me to look at. The mamba is a funny looking fish that they said is only eaten by men and also used by people suffering from HIV as it gives a boost of strength. Women cannot eat it and nor can people from the mamba clan.

I felt a need to wade out to see the fishing dealings up close. I was reassured that balharzia would not be a problem as they only get people in still areas of water. (Balharzia are worms which get inside your body under your toe nails and crawl up your body to be parasites, reproducing on your insides). I'd avoided going in the lake because of my fears but felt a need to put myself at risk. Walking around in the muddy water, I only appeared to collect a small leach on my foot: it remains to be seen whether I have any worms reproducing inside me. It can take 4-6 weeks to find out.

Dixon negotiated a price for a large fresh nile perch for lunch and we met many of the footballers from the local team bringing in their catches. We bought the perch from the guy who was going to take us to Amin's paradise island. We never made it on this trip in the end. There were lots of birds hanging around, especially hammercops and a saddle billed stork strolling about nearby.

On the way back from the site we revisited Culture the tame monkey for a last photo shoot, and returned to the project. Here, people were starting to gather for a last day of activities. I did some filming with Didas who explained to me his work in the garden and we found a couple of cobras who sadly ran away as soon as we got near. The main issues of the day were deciding what to bring to the UK and also trying to get some last snippets of film to try and cover the people at the place.

The ladies wanted me to bring many examples of their works to the UK - this mainly includes mats, trays, baskets and purses they have made using the resources from the garden. Also, Ben wanted me to take his carvings and Joseph wanted me to bring examples of his bark cloth - all things made at the project. I ended up delegating responsibility and letting them decide what was the priority. This naturally resulted in me having space only for a few smalls to add to my case and I ended up leaving nearly all my clothes behind. Many of them also gave me letters either for myself or people in the UK.

I left the project at 8 in the evening and was sad to go. I hadn't really developed any home sickness at all and was in no rush to return - but the show must go on.

Justine collected me and we returned to Kyangera - where I first stayed - to rest before my flight which was at the unseemly time of 4.30am. Justine had insisted on taking me to the airport in the morning. I was sorry to put her out at such an hour. I had my last supper with her, Marie and Bridgette and caught the first half of Nigeria v South Korea. I went to bed at 11pm to get up at 2am for the drive to Entebbe - about 45 mins. I drove us to the airport. The drive to Entebbe is fairly easy but you have to stay alert to potholes or boda-boda drivers suddenly surprising you at this time of night.

I was soon settled on the flight and was able to sleep. I was very tired by this point and regretting the 8 hour stopover I had planned for myself in Cairo following my landing in 5 hours time.

Cairo

Luckily, I was able to sleep and at Cairo I was very much up for the prospect of ticking off some cliche tourist trap boxes. I had no specific plan other than to see if I could actually get out of the airport and see something of the legendary city. I was soon deeply irritated and annoyed with the place.

It was very odd visiting the airport toilets and see myself in a vast brightly lit mirror. I naturally looked a state and was again reminded of how little i've seen of my face and self generally in the last month.

I purchased a visa and this was my entry to the Cairo theme park for the day. I was under no illusion that I would not be completely taken advantage of knowing what I had heard about the place and also having no guide books or anything or one to steer my passage. Tired and hungry I was soon collared by a tour guide and asked for around £75 GBP to be given a tour of the city and the pyramids. I decided all I really wanted from this was to get a picture of me in front of the pyramids just for the sake of ticking a box and just wanted to get on with it. I had a driver, guide and a car to myself.

The driver was a seething, snorting, wheezing lump, occassionaly slurping and dribbling at a huge flask of water. This chap was supposedly going to facilitate my tour of Cairo assisting in English but spent most of the time speaking on his mobile or to the guide in a loud and sticky, drawling Arabic. He had some small broken English and told me how he had enjoyed looking at sex films on one of his recent customer's phones and did I have anything similar to view on my phone? The net effect was unfortunately entirely evocative of Jabba the Hutt.

The rip off rodeo soon began as I was taken not to the pyramids or museums but to a conveyor belt of show rooms located somewhere on the outskirts of town underneath a huge highway. These shops were teeming with other English speaking tourists types - mainly jolly americans it seemed - and contained "authentic" Egyptian wares such as tacky art works made from papyrus paper; perfumes; and other tourist crap I wasn't interested in. I was given a guided tour of these shops and assured that I would be given "good discount". My back was very quickly up and I tried to stress to my driver and attending guide (whose English had all but deserted him - "are you enjoying the world cup?" "what? sorry, no understand") that I was more interested in historical sites.

When we got to the Giza pyramids I was instantly underwhelmed. The sun was much more severe than in Uganda and I and my guide were soon being harrassed and buffetted by people offering "deals". I had no time to take in the scene as I was constantly working out what my guide was up to and how we can make the harrassers disappear. My guide seemed just to not want to be there at all but entered into long fruitless discussions I could not follow. One guide wanted a tip just for the pleasure of having spoken to my guide. After some very protracted debates which resulted in me having to fork out more cash we were soon on horses trotting around the pyramids, looking at the sphynx, etc. Everyone I interacted with wanted a tip and I soon scrapped any efforts to be polite, resorting to being quite severe in saying no.

Without seeing the city centre or museum i was returned to the airport half an hour late. Deeply annoyed - especially when the driver asked for another £10LE to get into the airport, and a tip when we stopped - I thought I would try my luck by complaining to the tour manager. Of course they were nowhere to be seen but I was helped in tracking them down and, surprisingly, I got £25GBP back for my efforts after some negotiation. I'm sure I was still overcharged but it was a mini victory. It also gave me money to buy an Egyptian sim card and a couple of beers.

My flight was delayed so I was able to catch nearly the whole of England's defeat of Slovenia which was a nice lift. Generally though, the whole experience of Egypt was quite unsavoury. It was certainly a massive contrast to where I had been. I'm glad I was only there a day and have no desire to return any time soon.

... to be continued and updated with pictures

This is bat country..

This week has gone very quickly. It has mainly been more ad hoc pro bono english lessons. We also secured a couple of visits to a Big Boyz video studio in a place called Namasuba nearby. Here I have been showing a couple of the students how to use Adobe Premiere. I realise though it will take more than a few days as a they have never used a computer before. The guys held my hands in excitement on the mini taxi on the way.

Generally it has been quite leisurely. I have welcomed this very much but it is moving by so quickly. I realised for sure that I feel really safe and content here and that is quite something really. I have taken this very much for granted and have to remind myself to cast my mind back to the day before leaving especially when i was doubting what i might be letting myself in for. Uganda is a wonderful place to be.

Thankfully there has been no power shortages in Dewe and I have been able to follow the world cup. Saying that, the matches are airing at inconvenient times 2 hours later than the UK so I have the option of 2.30, 5.00 or 9.30. Classes are still running at 5 so 9.30 is the only real option. I watched some of the first games but got a bit weary of the low score vuvuzela bore nature of the occasion. Generally, I can't really be bothered with watching at 9.30 either as it is more fun to hang around in the trading centre. The football watching facility is a dark, brick shed with rows of wooden benches. Also, ugandan commentary is blared out full blast.

Much to my irritation, I have managed to catch both of England's pitiful displays. I quite enjoyed Brazil v Korea though. At home, I would be submerging myself in the hate that must be filling the air across england at the moment.

In nature, I have been kept awake by bats flying around my room and walking about on my mosquito net. There was also another Mr Lizard perched on top of the mosquito net the other day.

Tomorrow I will be witnessing a musical display by some local creative groups. We are also planning to row to a place called Paradise Island, a small island in the lake - which is now owned by a Muzungo - which was one of Idi Amin's favourite jaunts back in the day. Lutembe beach nearby is also a former favourite resort. The beach now is in some disrepair. There is the remnants of a concrete road on the dirt track, the concrete having been laid because of the former leader's wishes.

I have managed to bequeath onto the local team Dewe FC the boots from Boots for Africa. This was met with great joy but during training afterwards the wooden goal posts kept falling down. And one of the children kept crying when i took photos.

Despatches

Today, i felt myself becoming a little impatient for the first time (perhaps a little scientifically interesting). I've been with my associate Joy on the island of Buggala in a place called Kalangala for a couple of days and we arrived back on mainland 11am this morning. I only had 3000 ush in my pocket (1 GBP) so needed some cash to get back home and get some breakfast. I had assumed accessing an ATM in Entebbe, the country's second city and home of the international airport, would be relatively straight forward but i was remiss. ATMs refused my card before we used our last shillings on going to another part of town by moped to get to Barclays, but of course, Barclays ATM was closed "for maintenance" I was informed by the lady attendants who waited for me to enter the ATM room and stare hopelessly at the dead screen before informing me. In the end I was informed that I could use the trusty stirling in my pocket so i could procure the native shillings. Lucky. Nonetheless, I write without having taken any water today. It is midday and the sun laps threateningly at the doorway of the internet cafe. I've also got sun burnt for the first time. The sign "Ponography is prohibited" (sic) is above my station. I am in Kajansi about 2km from the project.

The Kalangala trip was designed to give me a chance to see another side to Uganda. It involved taking a 3 hour boat trip across Lake Victoria from Entebbe (which is about 16km from Dewe) to the island. The island, Buggala, is a part of the Sesse islands and seems to function primarily as a holiday resort. At the start of the 20th century, the islands were evacuated and left empty for 30 years because of a "sleeping illness" delivered by Sesse flies which was killing everyone. The vervet monkeys which now roam the island were originally introduced here to see if the islands were now safe.


My aid, Joy and I took to sea on Tuesday at 2pm. Our passage was enabled by an old but sturdy little ferry/commercial boat. We travelled second class, provided with wooden benches upon which to repose. First class was divided from us by a threadbare curtain. I was the only Muzungo in 2nd class. Outside, the open air deck of the old girl was packed with 8 motor vehicles, allowing little space to move but we took to deck to enjoy the scenery. I sat on the deck next to a man who was sleeping sat upright - not leaning on anything.

We arrived on the island as the evening was drawing in and Joy negotiated a cheap price for us to stay in one of the more upmarket resorts. It turns out we are here out of season. Summer here is the winter months of December, January.

As the resort bus took us along the broken roads, we winded our way up and along the crest of the island, the journey affording stunning views over the lush forest and across the great lake. Joy joked that he was going to take me deep into the island and eat me and also that he would leave me here in the forest with the monkeys for 5 years and I would become an African.

We arrived at our resort and there were indeed a gang of monkeys larking around in the trees above our digs. Although, I was more concerned about the ostrich casually roaming the compound. On first appearance, the digs were good with a shower and TV but it conspired that neither were fully functional. In the resort dining room, football was on and I caught the end of Portugal v Mozambique. Earlier I had caught the news that Rafa Benitez was now in charge of Inter. This left me desperately in need of someone to speculate with about who the next Liverpool manager might be. Roy Hodgson? alas.


We slept after a typical tilapia dinner. In the morning, I was woken by the screaming hornbill bird which seems to be ubiquitous in Uganda and spent some time with the monkeys. About 6 were playing with a plastic bag and i sat quite near. They were very jolly. we took a walking tour of the island and our guide Kasim thrashed a way through the thick forest telling us all about the history and nature of the island. I regretted choosing shorts as the long grass chaffed. We did not meet any snakes. About halfway around the trail, he started telling us about his community project on the island to help kids with HIV. The island has a disproportionately high level of HIV. There are 7 men to 1 woman on the island. The island also doesn't have consistent power so no hospital. They have a health centre of sorts.

So, here was another project. It seems there are "projects" all over the place. These guys were doing a lot of what Dewe needs to do, growing chickens and pigs to sell on and having a craft shop. They had lots more they needed to do but they aren't supported by any NGOs or government money. It's all done by the local community. They handed me a brochure riddled with spellos.

Speaking of NGOs, I had my first brush with such an institution on Friday, after my last post. The Rainbow school I visited recommended I visit KIBO foundation who provide a "training programme" to help unemployed people get into work. Thinking this may be of some use, especially to the young men at Dewe who keep asking me how to make business, and how to get to the UK, I thought they could help. I was impressed with the place and it was full of philanthropic aspirations. They basically give a free 3 month course to people who are accepted and train them how to be more professional and how to develop ecomonies in their local communities. Very good indeed. They are backed by Canada and a number of Corporate super powers. They had 7 pillars upon which the course is built. In short, the aim was evidently to try and give people a bit of western nouce to give talented locals ideas about how to stimulate their local economy.

So, a little skeptically, I told some of the lads at the project and they were very keen. I took them back to KIBO on Monday, which was a comedy of errors. 2 of them turned up late after their boda-boda ran out of fuel on the way to Kampala and I got stuck waiting with two of the others for one of the guys who never showed. We got there in the end and Isaac and Mike, who i was with, were introduced to a stern lady who told them they had better learn some good english and sort it out generally if they wanted a hope of succeeding at Kibo.

Whenever, you enter formal situations here, everyone speaks english, even if both parties are ugandans. I understand it is necessary as a pan-national secondary language because there are so many different languages in the country. But, many times it seems that people use their command of english to show that they are educated and dominate the less able. English is up, Luganda is down. So, we have situations like at KIBO where those who spoke english talk down to the less able and make them feel low.

The people here also find it funny if I speak Ugandan and that I like the boda-boda - both signs it seems that I am in a way lowering myself. I have started driving a boda as one of the guys at the project, King Isaac, has one, and I've been driving him around, even at night. One person asked me didn't I find boda bodas "disgusting" and another person told me it was wrong that I was driving someone as they should drive "us" out of respect.

Back to Kibo, Ben and King Isaac turned up later and were interviewed with a different person. Again I sat in and again they were both told, in the kindest and most benevolent tones, that they were currently of little use, but KIBO would "transform" them to be better and do better things. Isn't this what A4E does in UK? The lads were keen though. My favourite part of the interview was when Ben asked how Kibo benefited from giving out this "free" programme and the guy managed to avoid the question saying something to the effec oft: "don't ask this, don't think about how Kibo benefits. Kibo benefits by giving to the community." He was a fantastic speaker though - very inspiring - and I think the guys and Dewe could benefit from it. All in all, it was interesting to smell the NGO machine up close.

It seems a bit that strokes of luck and word of mouth are what dictates who gets the money or benefits here. There's no way the guys at Dewe would find out about such a programme if I hadn't been lucky enough to be tipped off by the Rainbow school.

An hour later, time is running out again! I am to resume classes at Dewe this pm. I wanted to add that there are some very interesting names here. I've been reading the newspaper the Daily Monitor when I can. There is an Ethan Mussolini who writes a column called, "how to get rich". His name was also brought up at KIBO as an inspirational guest speaker they get in for the students.

Also, the general election is in 2011 and the opposition leader for the Democratic Party is called Mr Norbert Mao. Could he ever be party chairman?

In other news, I've read that there may be power shortages during the world cup which is worrying as power is already limited and inconsistent in Dewe. Apparently, power comes hand in hand with corporate activity. So, they say that because a sugar works is closing for maintenance during the cup, they will also close the power supply in that area.

Back on the island, there was little more to report as I slept after our ramble and we got the boat back early this morning.

I need to thank Dawn at my job in the Council for the gift of condoms! I've given some to the local volunteer counsellor Dixon who tries to help the men at the project, and some to the local nurse Jane. They were both really pleased.

Thinking about my previous job, it is funny to see a country so desperately in need of a Highways Maintenance PFI. There are massive holes in the roads! Also, I've been taking public transport more. This involves 17 people being crammed into a small minibus. It stops whenever anyone once. Along way from reliable journey times and bus lanes.

Luzungu

I have been at the project now for 5 days. It has been very busy with classes running from 10am to 6pm with a break for lunch. I have been teaching english most of the time as this has been the main request. Keyboard has been happening in the background or at lunch times and videoing is happening occasionally. It makes sense to get the english going so people feel more comfortable.

We've had about 10 to 20 people each day and they are very keen to learn and everyone seems to be enjoying very much. We've also been doing some knitting, weaving and drying fruit.

Night happens from 7pm and is experienced in near total darkness. We have a parafin lamp and my head torch. There are lizards on the ceiling or crawling around the walls and sometimes they fall out the trees.

Me, Molongo, Nabukenya, Nazua and Chitiko and sometimes others gather for dinner in my room in the evening. After dinner on wednesday tonight, after the women had gone, Ben turned to me and said, "so laurence, tell us a story." I was taken aback at first - "which story? What do you mean?" - but they said it was a normal thing to do and insisted. I told them simply about my experience arriving in Uganda and they were very satisfied. I liked this routine though. Tell me a story.

At night, nature generally is very noisy here. Crickets and chameleons bleat the loudest. We have been out for a morning canoe around the lake. The fisherman Julius took me, Molongo, Ben and Hakim out at 6am on the lake and Ben pointed out various species such as the kingfisher variants, an eagle, hornbills and black kites and vultures among others. We saw a fisherman catch fresh tilapia and we bought it from him. 10k (3 pounds) for 5 fish squirming in the boat. We met a tame monkey (vervet i think) on the way back in the morning, living with a local family. It lives tied to a string but it looked very content, picking tics off a dog, chomping on mango and generally being very relaxed. I have not been bothered too much by mosquitos thanks to my jungle spray but since i have been here, 2 people i have been spending time with have contracted malaria. Despite appearing very rough, they still came to lessons and went to work.


I have been playing football with the local team, Dewe FC. They train every evening and play a game splitting into two teams and playing into one goal without a keeper, scoring by hitting the woodwork. In this case, the goal is actually made of wood and any part of the wood will do. It is fun but tricky as i sweat so much as soon as i move, and there is dung everywhere. Some of the chaps play without shoes and my friend Ben plays without shoes and with cuts he has incurred from nails while doing woodwork. I was glad to have brought ball as their's burst last night.

There is much mirth that there is a Muzungu amongst them. A muzungo is a kind of racial term but in a nice, affectionate way. I have been called it a few times as i have been walking around but not in a threatening way. Often, children or boda boda drivers huddle together stare at me and mutter "muzungu." I have been asking what it literally means. I was told at first it meant white man, but it is more than this. It literally means, "person who is not one of our colour." Muzungu is me. A Muganda is a person from Uganda. There are also muindians and mugermans. So really, I am a muenglise. But muzungu seems to be especially reserved for the english speaking peoples. Zungu does not mean white. gandans speak lungandan. Hence, I speak, lugunzu. In lessons, we move between lugunzu and luganda with relative ease and i have been learning lots of the local dialect. Kale sebo.

Other things

I find it a bit tricky to wash in a bucket with a canister of cold water in the dark.
I like going to the trading centre at night.
I have driven a boda boda.
Had some interesting discussions about what a sensible number of wives is to take.
Spent the day at Rainbow international school today.